You aren’t dead. I miss talking to you though.<\/p>\n
It’s always been my fault, and it always will be my fault. You deserve so much more than I will ever be. I should have just kept my mouth shut and maybe things would look different right now. Maybe I would still have you to lean on when I need a friend to talk to. <\/p>\n
Even after I lost everything and gave up on life, he didn’t change. It’s lonely, dark. Every single day is a battle to stay alive. And now I have to battle it alone. He says he’s on my team. But when I hit rock bottom, I find myself on a one man team and I’m drowning. <\/p>\n
He used to love me the way you liked me (at least I think you liked me). He would send me flowers to work. Send me mushy little cards or messages to let me know I was important to him. Then, one day it stopped. I don’t feel pretty or loved anymore. I suppose I deserve that. I have never deserved anything. <\/p>\n
I just wanted to find a way to say thank you. Thank you for showing me what it felt like to feel wanted and like I mattered again. Even if it was just for a short time. I hold on to those moments on days like today.<\/p>\n
I’m sorry I hurt you. You never deserved any of this and I’m sorry I drug you into this. I pray you find a beautiful woman who treats you like the amazing man you are. I’m so sorry for everything.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
You aren’t dead. I miss talking to you though. It’s always been my fault, and it always will be my fault. You deserve so much more than I will ever be. I should have just kept my mouth shut and maybe things would look different right now. Maybe I would still have you to lean […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":0,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1474","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-love-letters"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1474","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1474"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1474\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1474"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1474"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1474"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}