Hi. After I read the book, I thought about you, how you killed yourself at the age of 26. I will be 26 in four years. It seems so surreal, you were newlywed and expecting a child, my cousin, who never got to know you because you died before her birth. I cannot remember you myself but I remember my mother crying at night and I remember the sadness which was crushing her. You were her favorite brother. I guess she was really mad at the world and at her parents and at your wife for not taking more care of you. Because you had depressions and struggled with them all your life. When you died everyone in the family told us, the children, that you had an accident while you were hiking in the mountains, I know they did this to protect us or whatever, but I had nightmares of falling from a cliff and dying all my childhood and I’m still terrified of heights. Nobody really talks about you anymore, I don’t know if they ever really did, especially not about your death. As if you just disappeared and never existed. The only photograph which is ever present is at my grandparents home, where you half smile at the camera, like an eternal reminder that they couldn’t save you.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Hi. After I read the book, I thought about you, how you killed yourself at the age of 26. I will be 26 in four years. It seems so surreal, you were newlywed and expecting a child, my cousin, who never got to know you because you died before her birth. I cannot remember you […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":0,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-678","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-love-letters"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/678","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=678"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/678\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=678"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=678"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=678"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}