Well it’s been a year since you died…I don’t really know what I feel anymore. I used to be so sad that I couldn’t stand it, then I was mad, then I was confused, and now feelings come and go. Sometimes I feel sad again and it’s like I just heard the news again and other times I question everything. I know that I can’t think about the “what ifs” but that’s what you left us with. What if it was an accident, what if I had talked to you more, what if we had never moved schools? No one will ever know though. We were left with questions that we never should have had to ask and an empty bedroom in the house. I have learned to focus more on remembering the good things instead of just the sadnessYou sent me your name. Now you have to answer all the questions. The times we spent at the cabin on the lake and the inside jokes that, now, only I understand. I miss you so much and wish I had told you that I loved you more often. The last time I ever saw you I don’t remember if I told you that I loved you. That’s one of the things that I think about a lot. Cause I did love you and I still do.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Well it’s been a year since you died…I don’t really know what I feel anymore. I used to be so sad that I couldn’t stand it, then I was mad, then I was confused, and now feelings come and go. Sometimes I feel sad again and it’s like I just heard the news again and […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":0,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-906","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-love-letters"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/906","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=906"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/906\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=906"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=906"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/loveletters.avadellaira.com\/love-letters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=906"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}