"More than a stunning debut. It is the announcement of a bold new literary voice"
—Stephen Chbosky, author of The Perks of Being a Wallflower

Winter is always the hardest time of year for me. I miss you around the holidays, then your birthday happens in late January, followed by the anniversary of your death in early February. This year will mark 22 years since you’ve been gone.

I finished reading a book this morning called Love Letters to the Dead. There were so many moments in this book that were synchronous with my own experience of losing you that I thought you must have had some influence over my finding it. I wish it had existed in 1994. Do you remember that Aladdin was the last movie we saw together?

It has taken me a long time to learn that resenting your lost future, our shared future, is not the way to honor you or myself. I have such vivid memories of you, and even though half of them challenge my insistence on your perfection, I am grateful that you were real to me. And I carry you with me always.

I’ve written about you many times, but it feels appropriate to share a recent poem here: http://firstdraftfromtheheart.blogspot.com/2013/06/primacy-v-recency.html.

I love you, Sissy Jenny