"More than a stunning debut. It is the announcement of a bold new literary voice"
—Stephen Chbosky, author of The Perks of Being a Wallflower

I miss you big brother, you were my protector, you were everything to me. I wanted to say thank you Adrian, because you were always there when I was feeling down. I miss you so so much, brother. I miss those days when you used to put music in the car when you were taking me to the high school. I miss the way “How you remind me” sound in your voice, i miss everything. I miss you being overprotective when some boy was trying something with me. I miss our late night talks.
Mom is not ok, it’s been one year and she tries to hide it, but i know that she feels really bad. She’s in a depression, brother. Dad, tries to be the strong in the family, but you can see the pain in his eyes. I remember when you taught me what good music was, you put a lot of bands in my computer and you were explaining me every detail of every band. Kurt Cobain was my favorite, you knew that and you gave me a necklace of Nirvana the next day, now I never take it off. I knew that you sometimes did drugs, but you told me that you were ok, that it was only marijuana. It was sad to me seeing you smoking weed, because I knew that it wasn’t only that. Eventhough you told mom that you finished with the drugs, I knew that you were lying. I know that you used to hold a lot of pain inside, I knew it, and I feel bad because Iwas never strong enough to try to talk to you, because I was scared and I was as fucked up as you were. I remember the days you encourage me about saying that I was good at singing, and you used to tell it to all your friends and in those moments I felt really embarrased, but now I understand that you were proud of me, and I have to say that I’m also really proud of you. Maybe dad never showed to you that he was proud of you, he was very hard with you and I feel really bad about that.
I have to tell you that you were the best big brother in the world, I love you so so so so much. I wrote a song about you and you won’t be able to hear it. I won’t forget you, I promise.