"More than a stunning debut. It is the announcement of a bold new literary voice"
—Stephen Chbosky, author of The Perks of Being a Wallflower

I feel like often when someone passes, people use types of expression like “you would like up a room with your laughter”… And I always would scan through these types of statements without truly feeling what they meant. When you passed, I couldn’t attend your furneral and for that I am sorry. I don’t understand how all the people so close to you could stand there and be so brave and face that you were gone. I couldn’t. I sent my apologies for my absence and tried to forget. After a few days I realized I couldn’t go on without awknowledging you, so I planned a candle lighting for you. So many people showed up that in the middle of them admiring the posters I had made for you, I had to get away. I left and drove in circles and came back. I will never understand why it had to be you to go so soon. I now understood what it meant to realize the expressions about a persons laughter. It took me some time to see that I was spending more time reflecting and asking why then just being thankful to have had you in my life at all. Death is a part of life, I guess. It’s still hard for me to swallow that phrase. You were a beautiful part of life. And that is what I have chosen to focus on. The letter I left on your grave stayed under that rock for months and now it is gone. I had hoped your mom had taken it, and then worried about it hurting her heart when she read it. The letter was filled with all of our memories growing up, I know you heard the letter and smiled. You were always so invincible, until you weren’t. This book I read about letters to the dead, made me have flashbacks of our time together often. It really changed me, and how I viewed you being gone. I know you are somewhere listening. I love you.