"More than a stunning debut. It is the announcement of a bold new literary voice"
—Stephen Chbosky, author of The Perks of Being a Wallflower

You left me 1 year ago today. You took your life without thinking once about me. You always talked about how we were going to grow old together and have children. How do you think I feel? I miss you right now. Even though it was a whole year ago. I can’t stand the feeling of not having you here. I hate you so much for leaving me here… but yet I still love you so much. Please, please be able to at least feel and understand my words. I will never forget you… I can’t. Your beautiful blue eyes, your dark black hair, your amazing personality. You always seemed happy. Every day you would cheer someone up and little did I know that you weren’t happy. You could have gotten help. You didn’t have to jump. I love you so much Kai. My precious book that told me to come and write this letter. The book you left me with your suicide in it. The book that makes me cry every time I read it. The book you fingertips touched a year ago. I have re-read it a hundred times baby. I miss you, I miss you, ... Read more

Hello there! I hope somehow this reaches you, wherever you are. I just kinda wanted to say thank you for being you. I don’t know if this makes any sense, but it is so refreshing to look back in time and listen to a sound as free and creative as yours, and your bands of course. As a performer myself, I have always struggled with being able to let go and not be afraid or overly concerned about being looked at as weird or incorrect. Yes, I know I have this irrational fear of being an incorrect person, and it is so stupid now that I look at it written down. But it is just the truth and I can’t invalidate my emotions and feeling, now where would that leave me ya know? Ok, in short, I really appreciate you for kinda showing me that people naturally gravitate toward those who put themselves out there. I hope that one day i can be as creatively free as you were and really leave my mark in the performance world, seeing as I just want to make people out there fall in love with art or music because it has been so ... Read more

Dayana, te amo incondicionalmente. Tu partida me ha dejado quebrada de mil maneras, aún no logro entender como y por qué, siempre había querido escribir una carta así y mandarla al cielo, pero no me había animado hasta ahora que termine de leer “Cartas de amor a los muertos”. Es un estupendo libro, me sentí identificada con cada capitulo debido a que yo se lo que se siente perder una hermana. Te extraño, y te necesito tanto. El epilogo me quebró, me quiebro cada vez queme pongo a pensar en aquel día en el que te perdí. Perdona me si no fui la mejor hermana del mundo, perdona me si te decepcione, perdona me si te hacia enojar, por cada grito y cada desprecio que te hice. Perdona me por fallarte. Deseo con todo mi corazón volver a verte, se que no puedo traerte a la vida, espero algún día poder volver a venos. Teníamos toda nuestra vida soñada planeada, teníamos tantos planes, teníamos que crecer juntas. Tu siempre serás la mejor hermana del universo entero, gracias por haber aparecido en mi vida. Te amo por siempre.

Hello there! Happy new year, its 2019, its been like 19 or 20 years since you passed away? I don’t even know you as I never got to met you. It’s okay though, you left with a good impression and you left amazing life stories that my father got to tell me. I am so sorry of what happened last year with your grave and everything, I felt sorry that my aunties and uncles behaved that way, but I am kinda trying to be open-minded, perhaps they were really really busy with their work right? However, my family and I brought your wife, my grandmother to the Zoo before 2018 ends, on the last 2 days of 2018! She was so happy, it made me happy. She even talked about how you always got free tickets to the Zoo because of your company and you always bring the whole entire family to the Zoo. She told me it was like a tradition to always go there every year, but it stopped when you died. I could tell that my grandmother felt very happy that day. I will try to persuade my family to bring her out often okay? Even though ... Read more

Hi I know that you are supposed to write to a human butI wanted to write to you because I miss you. You were my first and only dog and although I may not have shown it at times I loved you with all of my heart. When you left I didn’t know how to fell and I was sad. even though we might be getting a new dog I want youto know that I will always and forever love you.

six+ years now. nothing about it feels real. i’m starting therapy because of it. i just i go through waves of missing you i guess. i’ve gotten a lot stronger now though. lennon is so so so amazing. i just can’t believe he looks so much like you. you would be so proud of us. i’m thinking about pursuing forensic science after high school. i’m so mad at the world for not letting you be here for my 16th birthday, or my first homecoming, or letting you meet my first real boyfriend (who ended up being a dick anyways). i’ve been missing you a lot recently and it just doesn’t seem right sitting in my room talking to myself, but this helps. i love you a lot, dad.

You’re not dead, I know, but this is a love letter so I figured I’d share. You’re not my first boyfriend, but you are my first healthy one. You’re constantly telling me “I’m not like them.” and I know you’re not, they just still hurt me. I can’t talk about what they did, no one would give a damn and my already insane mother would never let me out of her sight ever again. I think that’s why I’m still haunted by them. I’m the type of person who needs to tell people what is wrong, but most people see me as a complainer. I’m trying so hard to let them go but part of them is still buried somewhere in me. Thank you for being patient with me. Thank you for taking it one step at a time with me. Ever since we’ve been dating I’ve had a new outlook on life. People used to tell me that the world will slowly gain it’s color again, and they’re right. There’s not danger at every turn anymore. It’s liberating to see life everywhere. You really do bring out the best in me. You make me so happy it’s almost alarming. It ... Read more

I remember the first time that I had watched The Dark Knight. I fell In love with it. It was my favorite movie at the time and not just because I love the DC universe. Itś because you were in It. I had never heard of you before I watched The Dark Knight and this might sound a little weird but I was kind of obsessed with you. I looked you up after watching the movie and saw that you had died, made my heart sink. Everytime The Dark Knight is on I always try to watch it. The Joker Is my favorite male supervillain and you made him ten times better. I watched a interview that had Aaron Eckhart In it and he said that one of the first times meeting you and not on camera, you were just walking around the hospital bed making noises and little moments. You didn’t talk to him at all it was more like you were just preparing yourself for acting everything out in the next scene. I don´t know if that really makes sense but hopefully it does. People said that while shooting the movie you sort of went a ... Read more

I never really new you but I have been told stories about you that makes me feel like I knew you like you were my best friend. It was so sad when I heard that you died but I know that you are In a better place. We all miss you. Your brother misses you a lot too. I have only been to the cabins once when you were there and I never really talked to you so much and I think that was the first time that I had met you to where I remember. This year for deer hunting we got 6 deers in total. You probably already know that but It still is cool to say. I don´t think that I have ever had so much fun up at the cabins as I did this year. Everyone was always laughing especially when we talked about you. I was told that you were hilarious and that you were always talking. My dad told me that you were pretty much always drunk but not the bad kind where you were drunk because you were depressed. And he told me that If you weren’t talking and really quite you were ... Read more

I know you are not dead and the point of this is to right letters to dead people but I´m my heart you feel dead. I feel like you are really dead inside and that it´s hard to live in this world. I hope that Charlotte brings a new light into your life that gives you reason to live again and that you can be a better mother for her than you were for Aidan and I. I just want to let you know that I love you more than you could ever know and that I just want to see you again and hug you and never let go. When I was three I saw you as my hero but when I was four and you and dad got a divorce I didn’t anymore. Now here I am at 13 and I hardly ever see you and my sister. There are so many questions I have for you that are for only you. I can ask anyone else because no one would ever understand. I think that Is one of the many reasons why I am depressed and suicidal because of everything Aidan and I were put through at ... Read more