"More than a stunning debut. It is the announcement of a bold new literary voice"
—Stephen Chbosky, author of The Perks of Being a Wallflower

It’s been almost 3 years since you left us. Which mean it’s been 3 years that you have felt much better and not in pain. I miss you, we all miss you. I love you too, I would do anything to spend one more night with you. I wish we could go back to when I was little when I’d stay the night and wake up really early to play with my polly pockets. I wish you could be here to see how great I’m doing in school, sports and just life in general. I miss having Thanksgiving and Christmas with you, it’s hard to be there without you there’s a lot of emotion. If you were here right now I can already imagine me standing up to you and joking around about how much taller I am than you now. When I get my license I want to come visit you a lot more. I’ll need to get the address to your grave from NaeNae, wow that’s hard to say I’d rather it be “I’ll have to get your address to your house”. I really miss you Mamaw, I’m sorry I wasn’t there to see you much before you ... Read more

I hope you’re doing alright. I don’t remember you much, but my mom sure does. She would always show me pictures of you in Nana’s backyard, and of you laying in the hospital bed. I wish I really could’ve gotten to see you and know who you were. I wish I could go on adventures with you and go get a bite to eat. But you’ve been gone for sometime now. I hope all is well up there:)

I am sending this to let you know I still love you. Last week was a year from when you passed. I miss you. Jenny and Skidds miss you too. It’s not the same without you. Fabio Dimitri and red will never fill the hole you tore out of my heart when you got sick. Things have been moving slowly around the house. Every once and awhile we all reminisce about all the fun we had together when we were younger. You never got to see your kids grow up. They are a year old now. Henryetta Chubbs and Sapphire are the only ones left. Opal is gone and Sapphire has never been the same. She is angry. Probably for the same reasons I am angry at myself. Why did you leave us? Alone. Gaps where a heart should be. Everyday I regret not seeing the signs sooner. Why didn’t I just keep a closer eye. It’s all my fault that you are not with us now and I know that I just ask that you forgive me.

Hi, I hope you are doing well up there. How am I? I’m just hanging in there. I feel very empty and sad(?) this month, I have been trying to figure out why am I feeling like this. I know you don’t know this, but I suck at feelings. Sometimes, I have difficulty understanding my own feelings, but its weird because I can understand other people’s feelings. Maybe I’m just weird, I don’t know haha. Anyways! Even though, I feel like shit this month, all is kind of good, everyone else is doing alright. I had a lot of fun last month though, I went to a trip with mom and sister and I managed to hang out with my friends. You know, sometimes I wish you were still here so I can buy your souvenirs and share all the pictures that we took. But it’s okay, I accepted fate. School is starting real soon, so I have to prepare myself physically and mentally. Ugh. I’ll try not to be too whiney ok? That’s all, I love you.

It’s been almost 5yrs. since you left us. It is still hard to accept the fact that you are gone and knowing that we will do things without you. But it’s okay now for us now because we know that we can’t bring back the past especially someone’s life taken by GOD. I’m sorry that for almost one year I’ve never been able to visit your tomb. It’s just that I don’t have time now because of my work. But I am not forgetting to pray for your soul. I may not able to visit your tomb but It’s more important that I always praying for the peace of your soul and also for the guidance. Brother, i didn’t had the chance to say this to you while you are living, while you are with us, I LOVE YOU and that will never change even your not with us now physically. I know you can feel it anf we can feel your precense too with your love. Our parents are fine. They now on their 38th wedding anniversary. We just celebrated it yesterday. It’s BER months now here. We will miss you again this coming Christmas and New Year’s Eve ... Read more

I didn’t lived and shared enough moments with you and I feel like a horrible person everytime I think of that. I didn’t told enough times how much I love you and appreciated your company. I am so sorry. I hope that when I look to the sky and think of you and what happened you can forgive me. I love you. And you will always be my favourite member of the family. I wish you the best, there, in the top of the sky, in the high mountains or in the depest part of the sea.

Tus hijas siempre te amaron.

Yours, Tío Jorje, donde quiera que estés.

it’s been two years and i still can’t believe your gone. sometimes when i think of you, i forget that you’re gone. it was around halloween when you first went into the hospital. mom was sad because halloween was your favorite and it was possible that it was your last. that thought sat in the back of our minds and it became more real as you got worse. i tried not to cry in front of you because i didn’t want to cause you any more pain. i remember when granma woke us up and told us you had passed. i was in shock. i miss you so much. as halloween gets closer, we think about you. thank you for all the dimes. i miss you. and i love you.

I don’t know what’s making me write you this. I didn’t know you. But I knew your little brother, Joe. He was one of my best friends. I remember finding out that you had tried to kill yourself. I was sitting in the back of my history class with my two friends. People had been sad all morning but I didn’t know what was going on. Then, Haley showed me a facebook post that her mom had posted and everything made sense. It hit me why Joe hadn’t been at school. Apparently, that Wednesday, 2 days earlier, your dad had found yourself hanging from your bunk bed, your belt around your neck. He called 911 and you were taken to the hospital. By the time I found all of this out, on Friday, you had been on life support for 2 days. They didn’t know if you would wake up. I didn’t know what to do so I walked around our neighborhood, earbuds in my ears, volume turned all the way up, listening to the same 2 songs over and over again. Joe texted me and told me the next day that you weren’t going to wake up. I was devastated. Your family ... Read more

I’m so sorry. I’m sorry I couldn’t be the sister you needed me to be, and I’m sorry if you ever thought that I didn’t love you. If I could take back all of the hurtful heat of moment things I’d said, I would. I had a dream yesterday, and it wasn’t a dream filled with magic or a happy ending. It was just a dream about you and I, sitting and bickering over candy. I don’t know what hurt the most about it though. Was it waking up and realizing I’d had a good dream with you, or waking up and realizing that it was a lie because you’re gone? You’re gone and you’re never coming back. I don’t think I have it in me though to ask for you to come back, not to a world where you’d be in pain. I’d like to think life would be easier if I forgot you all together. Forgot the pain of losing you, the pain of having to say that I’m an only child now, that I’m not and older ... Read more

Oii. Tenho ido ao psicólogo e ele tem me dado algumas direções, estou melhorando. Preciso dizer que compreendo que você não fez porque queria, foi algo para matar a dor. Tudo bem, sempre vou te amar do mesmo jeitinho. Você sempre será parte da minha história, sempre será meu irmão e sou grata por ter tido sua presença comigo.

Tenho algumas novidades, mas vou deixar para te contar quando eu tiver certeza do que sinto e do que tenho a minha frente.

Amo você, Taz. Muita luz para ti.