"More than a stunning debut. It is the announcement of a bold new literary voice"
—Stephen Chbosky, author of The Perks of Being a Wallflower

It’s been eleven years since you left. I had so many kisses, so many hugs to give you. The first few years without you were hard, the emptiness you left is still difficult to fill. There is so much of you in dad, that sometimes I feel that I am talking to you through him. Many things happened, some good and some not so much, but I’m just going to tell you the good ones, so you don’t worry, as you used to do for me and my sister. You have a great-grandson whose name is Julian; he is 8 years old and he’s a beautiful child. I’m sure you would have been a wonderful grandfather. Apart from that, I’m studying to be an English teacher. I really like the language and I would also like to be a teacher so that I can help others become more extraordinary persons. I have very good colleagues and also teachers. I think these next 4 years are going to be fantastic; I’m really excited about this challenge, because it has not been easy for me to get to where I am now. You see, mom and dad got divorced 8 years ago, ... Read more

I know that this is supposed to be a letter for the dead, and obviously you aren’t. But you left me, and I still don’t know why. They say that the most painful goodbyes are the ones never said, the ones never explained. That’s exactly how you left me. Whenever I see you in the school hallways , when i meet your eye, you act like you don’t recognize me at all. You were my best friend, my only one true friend, and now you’ve left me completely alone without even one goodbye. Have I done something unforgivable? Am I such a loser that you couldn’t afford to be seen hanging out with me? To this day, these questions remain in my mind. I know that I don’t have the right to say these words for i have only known you for half a year, but those 6 months have been the best moments of my and that’s because of you. I know that you’re doing well and are very happy with your new friends, but I only hope that you’ll somehow read this letter and that one of these days you’ll be able to tell ... Read more

I had a dream about you last night- not that that’s unusual- you feature in a lot of my dreams. And you know about them (some) – I have really long movie-like dreams every night. Except they are nearly all nightmares now and I woke up this morning shaking and felling so ripped up inside. I can’t deal with those mornings-I have to shut everything away and try to wrap myself up with walls so that it doesn’t show. You’re not dead- though there was a time when I was scared shitless that you might be. I honestly don’t know what I’d do if you had committed- actually that’s a lie, I would be in pieces so small I don’t think that they could be put back together. My dreams are so long it would take a long time to tell every bit of them- and that’s the worst part of them- I can remember every bit of every nightmare and they haunt me all through the day. It was at a party (I think) we were all drinking but I remember being pleased because it didn’t seem to have affected me (in a bad way). Towards ... Read more

How happy were you when Mama gave birth to Ate? I wish I met you.

Hi, I was looking for Mary and came upon your family. If this is the same Mary, pls let me know. I knew her in Hoosick falls NY. She was previously doing jewelry and left for L to marry Tom. I know she came from NM. you may reach me at LGunneson@imi-ct.com

You left us.. I don’t think you meant to but you did. My dad was hurt and so wasn’t I.. I grew up with you you were always there for me. You would make me laugh and make me annoyed. Then you met her she ruined you. You were my uncle so I had to look out for you everyone knew what she was doing to you. She brought you drinking and made you do drugs. But little did any of us know she cheated on you. No one ever would have thought you would have did what you did. She told you so wrong, she should have told you better. She was pregnant and I hate it. My dad got the call and rushed there I didn’t know what happened. He told me that you had taken so many pills and drank way to much. You were not even a mile from your own house you two shared and she couldn’t go look for you. You were dead for about 5 hours and no one knew. I hate going to school with her kids and having them say how great of a guy you were when they didn’t get ... Read more

As days pass by, and years come and go I still think of you. You left us with broken hearts. And broken hearts hurt. I know you didn’t mean to, you thought you’d be fine but in the end you weren’t. I miss you.. everyone misses you. I hope one day I see you again. Maybe I have already seen you , maybe you blossomed into a flower. Maybe you are an caterpillar that has grown into a butterlfly. Maybe you were born again into a new life where your life has changed, for the better. How I’d love to know. Thank you for everything.

I can’t imagine I could ever miss someone I’ve never met, but I miss you, my little, tiny cousin. You never got to see the world, hear rain, and drink in the sound of family. Your little brother Elio.. He’s a handful! I bet you would have been a amazing big sibling! We never found out if you where a boy or girl, but to me, I’ve decided you are Lyla. Beautiful like your mother and with an amazing talent for music like your father. If only, if only, if only.. I miss you little lady!

Youre gone, and i need you here… i miss u so much well we all do it, i havent seen your parents but i know they miss u too, i still cant believe that your not around, school is not going well because your not there, i pretend that everything is fine but im breaking slowly and im still not ready to let you go, everything i see reminds me of you, we decorete your desk because no one can fit in that please, peopple say that youre taking care of me in the sky, but i dont want you there i want you here with me, i want you to take me pictures when im distracted, i want you to get angry because i dont sat with you, i want us to read all the comics you like, i want you to hug me when im crying and tell me that everything is goinf to be fine, i want to talk with you all nights… its hard wake up everyday and think that all was a nightmare and that i will see you in the bus smiling to me, my big brother, my favorite person in the ... Read more

I miss you so much. Even though I never met you, (you died before I was born) I learned from my father and Grandma that you were an amazing, hardworking man. I am now 13 and there is so much I wish you could have seen me do. I hope you are at rest up there in Heaven, I know you are looking out for me in the good and the bad times. I wish we could meet, say something ANYTHING. Dad misses you immensely, always talks about you. He loved you more than you could ever know but I know I’ll see you one day. Until then. Send my love to Geordie, Mav, Sammy and Daisy